Tiffany Nielsen

Dining Etiquette, Business Etiquette and Children's Workshop

Ask Tiffany: Can a Wedding Invitation Include the Registry?

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Dear Tiffany,

I’m getting married this August and I’m wondering if I should or shouldn’t include a registry gift guideline with my invitations. You know, an insert that lists where’s I’m registered?  I hear you aren’t supposed to, but I see more and more people including a gift registry card with their invitations.

-S. Kumpf- Mankato, MN

Dear Mannerly Bride,

Traditionally, soon –to-be married couples are to avoid inserting a registry shopping guide with their wedding invitations.  It can be considered by guests a presumptuous act. However, manners change with time; therefore, I see more often couples including a registry list with their invitations.

I am a traditionalist. I believe registries are best reserved for bridal shower invitations, and that wedding invitations remain the formal request to come witness the union of two people vowing to love, cherish, etc…But, a recent conversation with a traditionalist woman from the Baby Boomer generation begged me to consider it may no longer be presumptuous, but a matter of convenience to include a gift registry. “It saves me time,” she says. “I can go straight to the store or shop online and have the gift handled in no time.”

Time is of essence in this fast paced, busy world we live in. Therefore, I encourage you to ask yourself what you’d prefer if you were a wedding guest and if your personal list of wedding guests would concur with your decision. Congratulations on your engagement!

What is the Etiquette for Sending Invitations?

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Dear Tiffany,

What is the timeline for sending out invitations?  I hear it is 6 weeks, but does that rule apply to all invites or just weddings?

–          J. Norris – Hanford, CA

Dear Party Planner Extraordinaire,

I wish I could come to your party because my instinct tells me you know how to organize a class act event. Likely your guests are busy bees like you; therefore, the more notice you provide, the more splendid a turnout you will receive.  Four to six weeks is a good guideline to follow not only for weddings, but any celebration. Be sure to provide necessary contact information and an RSVP.  Meanwhile, spread the word nicely that honoring RSVP’s is back in fashion. Viva la Fiesta!