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Valentine’s Day Dining Etiquette… Showing the Love with Manners

February 14, 2012 By Tiffany Nielsen

Valentine’s Day Dining
Showing the Love with Manners

What I love the most about Valentine’s Day is the opportunity to find a special way to say “I love you” in a way that goes beyond the usual “I love you” as I’m running frantically out the door for an important event. Thankfully, I’m coming up on my fourth wedding anniversary, which I’m totally excited about because I spent most of my adult life single, and a lot of that time dateless on Valentine’s Day. Poor me, I know.

Recognizing that today’s message gets to you at the heat of last minute Valentines prep work, I want you to know I’m scrambling myself to make it extra special. Since “What’s for dinner” is standard conversation in our house, I’ve decided to serve up the evening’s dinner within a formal service laced with extra décor. Maybe you want to do the same; therefore, here are my Valentine’s Day tips to help you show love with good manners.

Formal Dining Place Setting

Place Setting for Formal Dining

Formal vs. Informal. Going beyond the norm is what will make your gift of cooking special. A good menu primer is a three to five course meal with all the trimmings associated with the ultimate place setting. Likely, you have all you need stacked in your cabinets. Pull it out, swish your place settings through a sudsy soap bath to clear the dust, dry and off you go to the table. Lay out your best cloth or even a colorful bed sheet if that’s all you have available (nobody but you will know). And, in case the place setting has you baffled, here are some good examples you can follow.

Place Setting for Casual Dining

Place Setting for Casual Dining

Do what works for you.

Dishing-Up a Little Scoop of Manners. When we arrive to the dining table, let’s keep in mind that cell phone usage at the dining table is the number one faux pas in the dining etiquette world. Yes, we like to be available and kill time combing Facebook and glancing at emails (like we ever just glance…) in between service, but all this kills the mood and serves up nothing but more disconnect. Arrive ready to be accessible to the people you are with. Give your love and undying attention to those who have made time to be with you, and only you.

And, if Valentine’s Day ends up being a first date, second date or part of the courting process for more potential dates remember this: He who asks pays. So, if you do the asking, count on paying. Going “Dutch” is so unromantic on Valentine’s Day, but if you insist on pitching in, discuss money before the date begins to avoid spoiling the mood.

If you think you are off the hook now, no not just yet. “A smiling face is half the meal”. This Latvian Proverb is true. Smile, smile and smile. Smile at everyone, even the ones who won’t smile back. Smile in gratitude, happiness and joy. Be happy this Valentine’s Day with anyone and everyone. Couple yourselves with the likes of happy, generous people. Snuggle with your pets. Be the gracious wonderful person you are. You are loved.

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Holiday Etiquette Tagged With: Dining, dining etiquette, Etiquette, Fine Dining, Manners, Valentine's Day

Dining Etiquette and Licking Knives

January 4, 2012 By Tiffany Nielsen

Photo courtesy of Google Images

Licking a knife at home is one thing, but licking a knife in public can be seen as an etiquette mishap. Cleaning up what’s left on the blade of a knife could be a personal preference or an old habit for some to break- I get it.

I recently watched a woman in a restaurant lick her knife blade dry. From the tip of the blade to the start of the handle, she didn’t dare let that dressing go to waste.

One problem with licking knives is that it’s dangerous. A bleeding tongue would feel miserable.

If a person interviewing for a job is invited to join a potential employer for a meal, licking salad dressing, butter, or whatever from a knife will likely become an unforgettable moment for the employer. It could also turn out to be a lost opportunity for the applicant. I suppose the interview situation would be different if the job somehow involved knife tricks.

I’ve seen plenty of people use knives as toothpicks, to pry open bottles and so on. So be it. However, licking knives during a job interview won’t necessarily leave a positive impression. Not everyone has stopped caring about etiquette.

Like I said earlier, this may be personal preference or old habits for some. For others, they may not know that there is the option not to lick their knives. In other words, no one taught them any different or they didn’t care to listen.

The moral of the blog is to create awareness and help anyone looking for modern, helpful etiquette tips.

 

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Business Etiquette, Dining Etiquette, Interview Skills, Kids Manners, Social Etiquette Tagged With: Business, Business Etiquette, civility, common sense, Dining, dining etiquette, Etiquette, Fine Dining, Manners

California School Loves Etiquette

December 6, 2011 By Tiffany Nielsen

Personal image and etiquette leadership were the hot new topics for 25 girls at Valley Preparatory Charter Academy. These smart and sophisticated girls relinquished their Saturday afternoon to hang out with “yours truly.” Keep in mind, they CHOSE to be there.

Mock interviews and confidence building activities broke the ice, helping the young women move comfortably past what they might have feared their Saturday would turn out to be- a boring lesson on how to be nice. Yes, we spoke to them about pleasantries and why they should abundantly use magic words like “please” and “thank you,”  but we also guided them to use the principles of etiquette so they could learn how to make this “life thing” work for them. I’m always surprised when I hear people say that their kids wouldn’t enjoy such a program. Au contraire!

There comes a point in education when we leave scissors and glue behind for more grown-up classroom materials such as computers and interactive white boards. In this case, since we believe it is more fun to interact  than listen to boring lectures about “do’s and don’ts” of how to look and behave, we splashed tables with craft supplies and fashion magazines to open a montage of collage making.  The agreeable chatter of “Oh, I love that!” and “I want these shoes. They are so me,” crafted the perfect opportunity to teach the girls how discover their personal image.

A three course dining etiquette lesson included warm bread, tasty soup and a deliciously prepared entrée followed by a late afternoon dessert. Mix good food with fun tips on how to refrain from grossing people out at the dinner table and you get a pleasant-to-be-around, graceful, enjoyable person.

Each girl received a personal consultation from my in-house image experts Marytina Lawrence and Sabrina Jimenez. Some people might not see how image and etiquette are connected, but they are. Imagine what it is like for a young girl to hear she’s beautiful and perfect just the way she is when statistic show eighty percent of girls find fault with their image?

It was our mission to energize these young women to become the best possible version of themselves.  We owe an abundant amount of gratitude to Executive Director, Shelly Melton, Educator, Lisa Taylor and Nutritional Coordinator, Janice Walstrom (below, third to the right) and her thoughtful team. Without them, this program might not be possible. Thank you!

Be on the look-out for these shining stars. We are so proud of them and we are forever grateful that schools like Valley Preparatory Charter Academy find means to continuously invest in their kids, knowing they deserve every ounce of it.

© Tiffany Nielsen

Filed Under: Civility, Dining Etiquette, Dress for Success, Interview Skills, Kids Manners, Social Etiquette Tagged With: Business Etiquette, civility, Dining, dining etiquette, Dressing for Success, Etiquette, fashion, Fine Dining, Image, Manners, Networking, professional development, protocol, training, worskshops, Youth Etiquette

Thanksgiving Day: Stress-free Holiday Planning Makes for Happy Hosts

November 22, 2011 By Tiffany Nielsen

LonnyMag.com/Eddie Ross

A Thanksgiving host/hostess expels countless hours preparing a beautifully crafted dinner to celebrate harvest and meaningful relationships. To save yourself from over-stressing and trying to be a super hero, enjoy these easy steps for setting a festive table.

Wash and Polish. Set aside time now to dust off your best dishes, clean and polish your favorite serving pieces and iron table cloths. Trust me, it’s a “must do” task to keep the sanity. You have more important things to do, like stuff the turkey and make those tasty side dishes, the morning of Thanksgiving.

Fancy it Up! Keep it simple in fancying up your table decor. You don’t have to spend extra money on table supplies. Tree leaves, branches or fresh flowers scattered amongst small pumpkins and votives will make for “ooo’s and ahaaa’s.” Just make sure you leave room on the table for platters.

marthastewart.com

Set a Perfect Place Setting.  To remove the guess work of setting a basic table, here’s a little map to follow:

Basic Table Setting by Emily Post

And, let’s not forget to enjoy our own gatherings of family and friends to give thanks for what is good in the world!

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Articles, Dining Etiquette, Holiday Etiquette, Party Planning, Social Etiquette Tagged With: Dining, dining etiquette, Etiquette, Fine Dining, holiday planning, Manners, party planning, Thanksgiving Etiquette

Thanksgiving Etiquette

November 18, 2011 By Tiffany Nielsen

Despite some claims that manners and etiquette don’t matter anymore, I am very thankful to be receiving a lot of positive feedback declaring that manners and etiquette still count!  So, I continue on with another week of good conversation about what I’m glad to hear isn’t a dying tradition.

As we embark on another week of Thanksgiving Day countdown, we may enjoy more opportunities to capitalize on making the sought-after day a memorable one.  First of all, we can sit back and take a deep breath, count our blessings and enjoy the life that we have before us. Then, on with the show! 

Provide Menu Options:  “John is lactose intolerant. Would it be okay with you if I brought a special potatoes dish for everyone to enjoy?” This is a perfectly acceptable and considerate gesture to make. It’s not nice to surprise the cook on turkey day. 

Hostess etiquette suggests asking guests (when they accept an invitation) whether there are any special dietary needs to consider because it feels good to have everyone happy in our home and at our table.  Likewise, good guests desire to help in any way possible, making sure the hosts enjoy the festivities as well!

Share the Guest List with Your Kids: If kids are prepared, they are more likely to greet guests cordially. Be sure to advise your immediate household that all guests are to be greeted at the door with big smiles, even if they are “regulars” at your home.  Yes, this means peeling away from the football game and off the couch to meet and greet.  Just imagine how delighted guests will be to know your family is glad they have arrived. 

Delegate!   If you are like most Americans, you are the chef, butler, maid, housekeeper and more. I’m confident if you ask kindly, most of your family and friends will be honored to help, and even insist you give them a job before you ask. I’ve learned the hard way that trying to “be all, do all” is just not realistic.  Especially on Thanksgiving Day, when people say they want to help, most of them really do. Remember, you are supposed to have fun and enjoy your company.

What are your favorite tips for making Thanksgiving Day memorable and less stressful?  Be sure to share your comments below. We’d love to hear from you!

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

 

Filed Under: Articles, Civility, Dining Etiquette, Holiday Etiquette, Kids Manners, Party Planning, Social Etiquette Tagged With: dining etiquette, Etiquette, Fine Dining, house guest etiquette, invitations, Manners, party planning, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving Etiquette

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