Tiffany Nielsen

Dining Etiquette, Business Etiquette and Children's Workshop

Valentine’s Day Dining Etiquette… Showing the Love with Manners

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Valentine’s Day Dining
Showing the Love with Manners

What I love the most about Valentine’s Day is the opportunity to find a special way to say “I love you” in a way that goes beyond the usual “I love you” as I’m running frantically out the door for an important event. Thankfully, I’m coming up on my fourth wedding anniversary, which I’m totally excited about because I spent most of my adult life single, and a lot of that time dateless on Valentine’s Day. Poor me, I know.

Recognizing that today’s message gets to you at the heat of last minute Valentines prep work, I want you to know I’m scrambling myself to make it extra special. Since “What’s for dinner” is standard conversation in our house, I’ve decided to serve up the evening’s dinner within a formal service laced with extra décor. Maybe you want to do the same; therefore, here are my Valentine’s Day tips to help you show love with good manners.

Formal Dining Place Setting

Place Setting for Formal Dining

Formal vs. Informal. Going beyond the norm is what will make your gift of cooking special. A good menu primer is a three to five course meal with all the trimmings associated with the ultimate place setting. Likely, you have all you need stacked in your cabinets. Pull it out, swish your place settings through a sudsy soap bath to clear the dust, dry and off you go to the table. Lay out your best cloth or even a colorful bed sheet if that’s all you have available (nobody but you will know). And, in case the place setting has you baffled, here are some good examples you can follow.

Place Setting for Casual Dining

Place Setting for Casual Dining

Do what works for you.

Dishing-Up a Little Scoop of Manners. When we arrive to the dining table, let’s keep in mind that cell phone usage at the dining table is the number one faux pas in the dining etiquette world. Yes, we like to be available and kill time combing Facebook and glancing at emails (like we ever just glance…) in between service, but all this kills the mood and serves up nothing but more disconnect. Arrive ready to be accessible to the people you are with. Give your love and undying attention to those who have made time to be with you, and only you.

And, if Valentine’s Day ends up being a first date, second date or part of the courting process for more potential dates remember this: He who asks pays. So, if you do the asking, count on paying. Going “Dutch” is so unromantic on Valentine’s Day, but if you insist on pitching in, discuss money before the date begins to avoid spoiling the mood.

If you think you are off the hook now, no not just yet. “A smiling face is half the meal”. This Latvian Proverb is true. Smile, smile and smile. Smile at everyone, even the ones who won’t smile back. Smile in gratitude, happiness and joy. Be happy this Valentine’s Day with anyone and everyone. Couple yourselves with the likes of happy, generous people. Snuggle with your pets. Be the gracious wonderful person you are. You are loved.

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

Christmas Hats: A Timeless Manner

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Christmas is surrounded by traditions, both old and new. Hats were a traditional accessory worn to church once upon a time, and I believe they deserve a come-back. I like the way hats dress up an outfit and turn eyes as people stop to look. Christmas Mass is my excuse to dress up my holiday outfit with a favorite red felt, timeless hat. I hope you find inspiration to wear your favorite hat this season. And, if you do, please be sure to take a picture and post it for us to enjoy.

Thanksgiving Day: Stress-free Holiday Planning Makes for Happy Hosts

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LonnyMag.com/Eddie Ross

A Thanksgiving host/hostess expels countless hours preparing a beautifully crafted dinner to celebrate harvest and meaningful relationships. To save yourself from over-stressing and trying to be a super hero, enjoy these easy steps for setting a festive table.

Wash and Polish. Set aside time now to dust off your best dishes, clean and polish your favorite serving pieces and iron table cloths. Trust me, it’s a “must do” task to keep the sanity. You have more important things to do, like stuff the turkey and make those tasty side dishes, the morning of Thanksgiving.

Fancy it Up! Keep it simple in fancying up your table decor. You don’t have to spend extra money on table supplies. Tree leaves, branches or fresh flowers scattered amongst small pumpkins and votives will make for “ooo’s and ahaaa’s.” Just make sure you leave room on the table for platters.

marthastewart.com

Set a Perfect Place Setting.  To remove the guess work of setting a basic table, here’s a little map to follow:

Basic Table Setting by Emily Post

And, let’s not forget to enjoy our own gatherings of family and friends to give thanks for what is good in the world!

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

Thanksgiving Etiquette

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Despite some claims that manners and etiquette don’t matter anymore, I am very thankful to be receiving a lot of positive feedback declaring that manners and etiquette still count!  So, I continue on with another week of good conversation about what I’m glad to hear isn’t a dying tradition.

As we embark on another week of Thanksgiving Day countdown, we may enjoy more opportunities to capitalize on making the sought-after day a memorable one.  First of all, we can sit back and take a deep breath, count our blessings and enjoy the life that we have before us. Then, on with the show! 

Provide Menu Options:  “John is lactose intolerant. Would it be okay with you if I brought a special potatoes dish for everyone to enjoy?” This is a perfectly acceptable and considerate gesture to make. It’s not nice to surprise the cook on turkey day. 

Hostess etiquette suggests asking guests (when they accept an invitation) whether there are any special dietary needs to consider because it feels good to have everyone happy in our home and at our table.  Likewise, good guests desire to help in any way possible, making sure the hosts enjoy the festivities as well!

Share the Guest List with Your Kids: If kids are prepared, they are more likely to greet guests cordially. Be sure to advise your immediate household that all guests are to be greeted at the door with big smiles, even if they are “regulars” at your home.  Yes, this means peeling away from the football game and off the couch to meet and greet.  Just imagine how delighted guests will be to know your family is glad they have arrived. 

Delegate!   If you are like most Americans, you are the chef, butler, maid, housekeeper and more. I’m confident if you ask kindly, most of your family and friends will be honored to help, and even insist you give them a job before you ask. I’ve learned the hard way that trying to “be all, do all” is just not realistic.  Especially on Thanksgiving Day, when people say they want to help, most of them really do. Remember, you are supposed to have fun and enjoy your company.

What are your favorite tips for making Thanksgiving Day memorable and less stressful?  Be sure to share your comments below. We’d love to hear from you!

© Tiffany Nielsen. All Rights Reserved.

 

Thanksgiving Etiquette: Tips for Holiday Planning

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Thanksgiving Etiquette
Etiquette Tips for Holiday Planning

Whether this is your first or 50th year for hosting a Thanksgiving gathering, it’s a big deal! There’s the guest list and menu to plan, cleaning to be done and considerations of etiquette and manners to make the day enjoyable for everyone. Here are a few tips to celebrate this memorable American tradition with class.

Invitations If you are the host, consider assembling your invite list by the end of this week to establish a “head count.”  The Emily Post Institute suggests we begin inviting guests from two months to two weeks prior to Thanksgiving Day.   Basically, you want to give people plenty of time to make travel plans and provide enough time for you to get going on grocery shopping. Hit the sales, grab your coupons and plan on a few guests sticking around the following day for leftover turkey sandwiches.

RSVP Although a host or hostess may give you an RSVP deadline, consider responding as soon as the invitation is extended.  If you received a “family” invitation, let the host know how many of you can come. Uninvited guests, although welcomed gracefully by a good host, can’t be planned for if not anticipated. Not responding is a giant etiquette faux pas, and one many of us remember for a long time.

Offer to Contribute Once you’ve been invited, you may want to think about contributing something to the meal. Wine, pies, breads, etc… simply ask, “Is there anything you would like me to bring? This is an important lesson to teach our kids. I mastered making homemade pumpkin pies in college because my mom made me (in a roundabout way). She taught me to ask the hosts how I could contribute. Since pie was always requested, I made pie (I couldn’t afford Marie Callender’s).

Order/Pick Up the Meat: I don’t know about you, but menu planning is huge in our house because it’s the food and the company that brings us to the table. Follow “good common sense protocol” and order that bird a.s.a.p. (or beef, which ever you prefer). Last Easter I called the butcher for a leg of lamb Easter week and they were out (dah, Tiffany!). Turkey isn’t hard to find, but testing your luck with 20 people sitting at your table without any sign of delivery on the traditional meat serving they’ve been waiting for all year isn’t something I advise.

Have fun planning and contributing to a beautiful American tradition!